Speeding ticket leads to non-penalizing penalty in Cambodia
Breaking news: The Amazing Race 13 started on time for the first time in weeks. Haleljah. Of course, since there can’t be two victories in one week, a quarter of this week’s episode was airline ticket drama in a New Zealand travel agency, none of which affected the results at all. At least there was good stuff once the teams arrived in Cambodia:
- Having won the Travelocity trip as the winners of last week’s Travelocity leg of the Travelocity Race, Ken and Tina did their new duty as Travelociwhores and looked at information about their vacation while the gnome sat unobtrusively on the table next to their laptop. I always do my web surfing with oversize web site mascots sitting on my desk.
- During an interview, Ty referred to his girlfriend Aja by saying, “I wouldn’t trade her in for a Porche or anything like that.” The result were two awesome facial expressions: Aja looking at him with a Did you just say that? face, and Ty looking back with a face that said, Yes I did, and I thought it was funny until I just saw your face, and now I am going to pretend that I never responded to the question. Where am I?
- Kelly and Christy mocked Dallas—“Doesn’t that hair remind you of ‘Teen Wolf’?” one of them asked. Dallas was annoyed, although not enough to compose a coherent sentence. “Kelly and Christy irk my nerve,” he said. “I wonder what they would look like when they don’t paint their faces in the morning.” Zing!
- Andrew and Dan were having trouble pumping gas, and asked Ken if there was a trick. “Just like pulling the zipper down and letting her flow, boys,” Ken said. He did not demonstrate.
- Best metaphor of the night: “It’s hotter than Satan’s toenails up in here,” Aja said.
- “Gosh dang them, turkey lips,” Tina said of Nick and Starr. I’m not sure if that was some kind of Tampa colloquialism or an indictment of Nick and Starr’s facial features.
- In Cambodia, Dallas described a village by announcing that “the town’s in the water. It’s like Waterworld.” 1995 film reference—zing!
- Kelly and Christy said something at the beginning about using their smarts, but are so dumb they forgot to do that. Instructed to collect a pair of chattering teeth from a local dentist, they arrived and one of them saw the dentist working on a woman and freaked out. “Holy crap!” she said. “Oh my gosh, I thought we were taking that woman’s teeth.”
- Amazing Race moment of the week: “I must just be missing it. I must be blind,” Tina said as she was literally standing in the room that she was supposed to find at Angkor Wat.
- Nick and Star came in first, breaking Ken and Tina’s streak, and winning a trip from Travelocity. Wait, I thought Expedia—I mean, Orbitz—sponsored the show.
- “It’s the original Playboy mansion,” Andrew or Dan said about Angkor Wat, for no discernible reason. Maybe they found its towers to be phallic? Maybe they’re just trying too hard to be funny constantly?
- Trying to find the pit stop, Dan said, “Does anyone see a lot of Americans around?” That may be the smartest strategy ever used on the race: ask where there are a bunch of cameras. When looking for clue boxes or other not-so-hidden things they just can’t find, teams should ask locals, “Did anyone see my camera operator panning away from me for an ironic shot of something I keep running past?”
- Ty and Aja were eliminated, which was somewhat predictable thanks to all of their relationship talk this week, but the biggest surprise came from a post-episode announcement from Phil Keoghan: “Because Terence and Sarah were stopped for speeding, they received a 30-minute penalty that did not affect the outcome of this leg but will be applied to the start of the next.” Um, what? If it didn’t affect this leg, meaning they arrived 30 minutes ahead of the eliminated team, hasn’t it already been applied? Why would it then impact them next week? Did the producers just not find out about it—or figure out what to do—until after eliminating Ty and Aja?