Teams travel to Hong Kong to wallow in stereotypes

Four teams, four episodes to go. What kind of ending of this Amazing Race All-Stars episode possibly have?

  • Dustin and Kandice had a conversation with an employee at the Kuala Lumpur airport that I swear was dubbed in. Suspiciously, we didn’t see her face at all during the whole conversation. The one thing we saw the woman say was “five o’clock,” and her lips didn’t really match the voice; perhaps it was easier than subtitling?
  • “It’s okay; keep it open,” a very kind man at China Airlines told Charla, who was trying to close the door to prevent other teams from coming in. Mirna, I think, lied and said, “It’s too cold, too cold!” and Charla closed it anyway. So this is what they meant by playing nice.
  • “Um, yeah, okay,” the China Airlines rep told Dustin and Kandice, who were insisting that it was important for them to get on the flight. What The Amazing Race needs are more people who will tell the teams and their camera crews to screw off.
  • “Whatever it takes,” Mirna told Eric, insisting that they should work together to get the blondes out. Now we know why the editors keep showing us the footage of Mirna talking about playing a clean game. Later, Mirna got into an annoying fight with them at another ticket counter. During one of these ticket counter fights, I’m just waiting for an airline rep to pepper spray them.
  • Ticketless, Dani asked Eric, “What do we do?” He said, “Go stand in a puddle and drop your hair dryer in it and kill ourselves.” Eric: all promises and no action.
  • “We can make a beauty queen sandwich out of her,” Dustin or Kandice said, referring to Mirna.
  • In the Kuala Lampur airport, Mirna pushed Charla, who was standing on a luggage cart. In the Hong Kong airport, Charla popped out the wheels on her tennis shoes, and Mirna pulled her along. Next week, Mirna pops open a playpen and lifts Charla into it, telling her play quietly while Mirna stands in line for tickets.
  • Phil introduced the Detour and said “teams have to choose between two things visitors commonly associate with Hong Kong.” The options: Kung fu fighting and “Lost in Translation.” Thus, when he said “visitors,” Phil meant “dumb Americans.”
  • For the part of the challenge where they had to find a sign written in Chinese, I assume Phil was referring to the film “Lost in Translation,” but it was set in Tokyo, not Hong Kong.
  • Explaining one of the Detour options, Phil said, “Once here, they must climb up an 11-story bamboo scaffold, while avoiding an ongoing battle between stunt kung fu experts.” Best. Challenge. Ever.
  • At the Fast Forward, while being strapped into a stunt car that was about to go up a ramp and flip, Oswald said, “If I wet these pants, it’s the only pair of clean pants that I brought.” Now he knows why Teri and Ian wear disposable underwear.
  • Climbing the bamboo scaffolding, Mirna said to the kung fu fighters, “We are trying to make love, not war.” I’m not going to ask why dangling from a rope and climbing up the side of a building is comparable to sex for Mirna.
  • Introducing the Roadblock, Phil said the team member “must enter the stunt world, Hong Kong-style.” So, out of four challenges in Hong Kong, three were stunt-related. Someone ran out of ideas and had to flip open their book of stereotypes.
  • “He was mad that I could possibly be right about something,” Danielle said of Eric, after she hired a cab to take them to the pit stop. They were last, but Eric, Danielle, and Eric’s green workout pants were saved by yet another non-elimination leg. Luckily they’re sticking around, because Eric’s last Amazing Race episode couldn’t be one during which he said nothing homoerotic.

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