Jessica will star as Jessica Sampson in her rack-referencing ABC sitcom.

Jessica will star as Jessica Sampson in her rack-referencing ABC sitcom.
Branching off from Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica to the world of ABC sitcoms will apparently not involve much branching for Jessica. Defamer, the answer to the West coast’s bitchy blog inferiority complex, has obtained and watched a copy of the pilot. The site says it “was the most excruciating television viewing experience we’ve ever had, and once we screened Rock Me Baby during a ball (or labia) waxing.” In an apparent effort to keep Jessica’s confusion to a bare minimum, her character’s name on “Jessica” will be “Jessica Sampson,” and she’ll be dating “an offscreen boyfriend named ‘Vic.’” Besides “incessant references to Jessica’s rhododendron-level intellect,” Defamer also says that in the first episode, “there were frequent mentions of her rack.”

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