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Challenges

Rookies win Gauntlet 2 after veterans quit final challenge

The Gauntlet 2 ended last night, six or eight weeks too late. The season started strong but dropped off almost instantly; from the lame game to the constant quitting, it was nothing compared to The Inferno 2.

The episode started with some Derrick drama. He was undefeated in four previous Gauntlet challenges, but in the very last Gauntlet challenge of the whole season, he was finally beaten. By Timmy. From Road Rules. Who’s, like, 54. So, Derrick and his heart went home.

Of course, it wouldn’t have been a Gauntlet 2 episode without some massive TJ Lavin confusion; he lived up to his reputation as the most unqualified, out-of-his-element host ever. (Maybe next time they could actually get a host who makes sense when he talks.)

For the final three challenges, each team could bet a total of 250 chips, with a max bet of 248 on a single event. The Veterans bet everything—248 chips—on the first challenge, which involved eating 12 pounds of some quasi-gross food. But the Rookies beat them, as Julie was still chewing when TJ rang the bell prematurely. Everyone freaked out, and TJ said, “Guys, guys, calm down. Everybody, calm down. Calm down.” Meanwhile, as if unleashing all of hell’s creatures with her grating voice, Kina screamed, “We fuckin’ won!”

As referee, TJ’s never been very good, and it doesn’t help that he’s refereeing competitions that are nearly impossible to referee. He went off to review the footage, as if he was a real referee, and the producers even showed us TJ watching footage on a camera, as if this was his decision to make, or as if he had any freakin’ idea where he was.

He declared the Rookies the winners, and so the Veterans quit. As Aneesa said, “as a team, we decide we’re just going to walk, we’re done.” A total of $240,000 was awarded to Landon, Ibis, MJ, Randy, Jodi, Susie, Jamie, Kina, and Alton. “I’m a rich bitch,” Kina said, but unless I’m misunderstanding, she’s anything but that, since they have to split the prize money. Believe it or not, they get $26,666.66 each.

That’s half of the Fear Factor prize or about as much money as they could make doing 10 college appearances. Tragically, we don’t get any money for suffering through this, one of the worst Challenge seasons ever.