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America's Got Talent

NBC debuts America’s Got Talent tonight

NBC debuts America’s Got Talent tonight at 9 p.m. ET, adding yet another talent search reality TV show to the lineup of unwatched talent search reality TV shows. The Simon Cowell-produced talent search show won’t feature the acerbic Brit as a judge, but it will feature another acerbic Brit as a judge, Piers Morgan. Joining him as judges are David Hasselhoff and Brandy, and to ensure the show’s a complete joke, Regis Philbin hosts.

Like American Idol, contestants will audition and then gradually be voted out, with the winner getting $1 million.

No critic has apparently seen the show yet, but Regis and Simon did do a conference call together, where they proved, to a “revolting” degree, according to the Washington Post’s Lisa de Moraes, that they love each other. Simon said of Regis, “I never in a million years dreamed I could get Regis; it was the quickest and easiest decision any of us had to make. … NBC said yes in a millionth of a second and was doing cartwheels.”

And Regis said that it was Simon who was responsible for Idol’s success. He “single-handedly caught the attention of the whole country and brought them to this show,” Regis said. And Simon replied, “Regis, I love you — I love you, Regis. I need this on a daily basis. I do appreciate it. Thank you. Thanks for that, Regis.” At least we now know one talent the show will reward: ass-kissing.