Two eliminations, no surprise as Katie Stevens, Andrew Garcia leave American Idol

Despite the sad faces of their fellow finalists, Katie Stevens and Andrew Garcia’s departure from American Idol 9 wasn’t a surprise nor really sad. Andrew has been barely holding on all season, and Katie was doing okay but wasn’t ever going to win.

Ryan Seacrest—who was surprisingly calm, perhaps as a result of the shitstorm of criticism he got over his behavior on Tuesday—explained that “over 34 million votes” were cast, which is “the highest number so far this season.” That seems kind of low, especially since 64 million votes were cast for the final three last year (not exactly comparable, because there’s obviously more interest toward the end, but still low).

Meanwhile, Seacrest and the producers have completely run out of ways to eliminate contestants, so this time they proved they can do a results show in 30 minutes or less by dumping one contestant virtually immediately, or at least as immediately as this show gets. After some lip-synced nonsense, Seacrest dragged Aaron, Casey, and Andrew Garcia to the center, bullshitted with Andrew, and then crushed his dreams. Efficient!

But then the show wasted time, and later Adam Lambert played with some lasers and sparkly things as he showed the finalists how to, like, perform, and Seacrest sent more people to safety until Michael Lynche and Katie Stevens were left, and Seacrest made a point of saying that “the other person was not even in the bottom three this week.” So they just used Michael Lynche for drama, basically, since he had the lowest number of votes last week—but predictably, he was easily safe because his near-elimination last week led to a natural upsurge in votes.

Next week is Idol Gives Back, which will remind us to help people who are suffering by making us suffer through its two-hour telethon.

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