Honey Boo Boo gets a show, on which her family eats road kill

TLC has given Honey Boo Boo, drinker of Go-Go Juice (i.e. Mountain Dew and Red Bull), her own show: Here Comes Honey Boo Boo. And that’s just the start of the madness TLC is unleashing upon us, as if Toddlers & Tiaras and its abusiveness and madness weren’t enough. Then again, after you’ve played a Justin Bieber death threat for laughs, there’s nowhere to go but down.

Cameras will follow Alana and her family, including her pregnant 17-year-old sister Chickadee and another sister who’s nicknamed “Chubbs,” and her mother June, who is pictured here dressed like her daughter and thinks giving her daughter caffeine and energy drinks is an acceptable alternative to alcohol.

The network calls the show, which debuts in August, “an inside look into Alana’s world where the six-year-old pageant sensation proves that she is more than just a Go-Go Juice-drinking beauty queen”; her life also includes “four-wheeling through mud pits and picking up road kill for the family cookout.”

Yes, you read that correctly: eating road kill. Kind of a perfect metaphor for TLC’s programming strategy.

Surprisingly, man not eaten alive on Eaten Alive

Eaten Alive

Discovery Channel’s happy family holiday special Eaten Alive aired Sunday, rewarding viewers for their two full hours of viewing by ensuring that they spent quality time in the company of others instead of wasting that time doing something else that might not have been as satisfying, such as buying things that have labels which accurately reflect their contents.

Winter 2015 reality TV debut schedule

winter 2015 reality TV schedule

Mark your calendars with all these upcoming reality TV show debuts, including Celebrity Apprentice, The Bachelor, and another season of MasterChef Junior, all of which kick off in early January.

There are also 20+ shows debuting in December--including the one-off return of The Sing Off. No winter break for reality TV.

about the writer

Andy Dehnart is a journalist who has covered reality television for more than 15 years and created reality blurred in 2000. A member of the Television Critics Association, his writing and criticism about television, culture, and media has appeared on NPR and in Playboy, Buzzfeed, and many other publications. Andy, 36, also directs the journalism program at Stetson University in Florida, where he teaches creative nonfiction and journalism. He has an M.F.A. in nonfiction writing and literature from Bennington College. More about reality blurred and Andy.