Heidi Montag will “now become a full time motion picture actress” and a screenwriter

With the news that MTV has cancelled/is ending The Hills, one of its stars has announced her post-fake life plans: Heidi Montag will become an actor.

“I’m so excited The Hills is finally over and I can now become a full time motion picture actress,” she told People. “There is no better training [for an actor] than being in front of the cameras 24-7.”

Learning how to act might help, but that will be especially challenging with her newly immobile face. (Heidi is convinced she knows how to act because she appeared in a not very funny Funny or Die skit.)

But wait, it gets better: She also thinks she can write screenplays. “I am making the first 3-D beach comedy about a shark that attacks a small beach town and I save the day with my 3-D boobs. I’ve even written a role for Dolly Parton to play the town mayor” she said.

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