Janice Dickinson was the runner-up in the seventh UK season of I’m a Celebrity, but Americans aren’t fond of keeping annoying people on reality shows, so she was voted out along with Heidi Montag’s sister Holly, who looked crushed even though she was only on the show for 10 actual days and six episodes, having replaced Heidi.
Lest we think Janice’s exit means the end of drama, both Heidi and Spencer will return, and they clearly won’t let Al Roker’s attacks deter them. During a preview segment that included clips of their obnoxious behavior, the announcer said, “and on the finale, they’re back.” Spencer’s Twitter post about the return said “Speidi is going to win,” which suggests they’ll still be allowed to compete–utter bullshit but fitting with the show’s general lack of rules. He also thanked NBC and said they’re traveling to Costa Rica this weekend.
Before Janice left, she caused more drama, insisting that vegetables in their food supply were for her pooping purposes only and not for the other cast members, and just generally doing her annoying screeching thing. During a Big Brother-like challenge during which the cast searched through mud that also had baby crocodiles or maybe just iguanas. “They were looking at me for lunch,” Janice said, but I can’t imagine that’s true, because wouldn’t a gator/crocodile/lizard want to eat something other than bones? Putting on her wrestling costume for the challenge, Janice said, “My children will be so embarrassed.” Yes, but not because of your clothes, Janice.
Meanwhile, there wasn’t much content at all during the episode, or at least it didn’t seem like much. And why the hell are the show’s actual episodes live? Most of the parts that are live are the godawful host segments, and since they can’t make it through a teleprompter screen without screwing up, why not tape those? “Live” means nothing when there’s nothing dramatic that can happen live.
The elimination ceremony was allegedly live, but was really weird and maybe not live at all. Although we saw a quick shot of the hosts walking into the camp, there was no footage of the hosts actually talking to the contestants. And seconds after they eliminated Janice, they suddenly appeared away from the contestants, back in front of the teleprompter, but they were in a different place than where they started the segment. In other words, the elimination itself seemed pre-taped–or was just so mishandled it seemed pre-taped.
The show mercifully concludes next Wednesday, unless NBC decides to extend the show to three hours a night for the rest of the summer, which seems like it would fit their general programming strategy. As a bonus, even at its dullest moments, it’s a lot funnier than Jay Leno.