Brooke White eliminated after Ryan Seacrest defends Paula Abdul’s honor

Brooke White’s increasingly bumpy journey on American I dol 7 has ended, as she was voted out. “I just want to say thank you,” she said after hearing the news. “This is going to be terrible for me right now, but thank you.” She apparently meant a terrible final performance, as she reminded us of her most entertainment moment by choking and stopping a couple times.

Syesha Mercado was also in the bottom two, but it was David Archuleta who seemed like he expected to be there, if you can buy his facial expressions as genuine, which I really can’t anymore. He kept saying “oh my God” over and over again as he walked to the couches. The person who really needed to be saying that was Jason Castro, who was also safe, and apparently has nine lives and/or a crazed fan base.

Tragically, the show brought back the stupid viewer call segments, although it did result in a rather strange moment when Simon Cowell’s childhood lover called in. Tara Miller, age 46, asked Simon about “your first kiss with me at the bottom of your garden … when you were nine years old.” Simon seemed more stunned than Archuleta, saying, “This is really you, Tara?” “This literally was my first kiss, this was my first crush,” Simon said; he was nine. Paula Abdul ruined the moment by asking, “Tara, are you over the rabies?” The audience turned against her and nearly booed, but Ryan promised to “exchange numbers” so Simon could get in touch with Tara again.

Meanwhile, on his radio show Wednesday, Ryan Seacrest offered a detailed explanation of what happened on the performance show, when network executives overruled the producers, leading to an unexpected round of judging.

But during last night’s results show, he brought up Paula Abdul’s mistake and said only, “The rumors: they’re not true. She’s part of our family, and we love her, so a round of applause for Paula.” That’s a pretty hypocritical statement odd coming from someone who once accused her of being drunk during a show, and is especially strange because he sounded like was defending her against a far greater accusation, like that she was a murderer or a terrorist or something, not that she’d just screwed up.