After “28 days, five continents, and more than 45,000 miles,” as Phil Keoghan said, The Amazing Race 11 limped to a drama-less conclusion. The final three teams ended up on the same final flight from Hawaii, so the race was really just a cab ride, a 10-minute challenge, a cab ride, and a brief run. The teams finished in the same order they left the challenge, leaving no suspense.
With two all-female teams in the final three, the race seemed ready to have its first male-less winning team. Instead, Eric and Danielle won, having arrived at the challenge first.
- Recapping the season, Phil said, “Eric tried to dominate Danielle,” which turned out to work better than it did with Jeremy.
- “I owe my life to you if you can do this,” Mirna told an airline representative, who got them a seat on an earlier flight. Something tells me she won’t make good on her promise, although we’d have great fun watching Mirna live her life as an indentured servant.
- “Charla and Mirna have been known to snag great flights that no one else found out about,” one of the blondes said, and then along with Danielle and Eric, they searched their plane for Charla and Mirna. I think they missed a great chance for comedy here; they should have looked in the overhead compartments and in the seat-back pockets.
- Running along a rocky beach, Mirna screamed, “Charla, you have to run. You have to run, it’s a race!” Oh, so that’s why the show is called The Amazing Race. Thanks, Mirna!
- Teams had to paddle kayaks out to a shipwreck against violent waves, which was a pretty dramatic challenge. One of the blondes thought the task would be easier if they climbed out of their kayak and walked it to the buoy, and thus began their first real meltdown fight of the season.
- They made up quickly, however, and as they got to the airport, one blonde said, “I wonder if there’s an area where you buy tickets.” Their last flight on two seasons of the race and they still have no idea what happens at an airport.
- “It’s either a million bucks or nothing,” Eric said. I choose nothing.
- Mirna told a cab driver, “this is just a crazy adventure and you’re part of it.” Except for, you know, the $1 million prize and fame and all.
- “This is worth a $1 million to us, literally,” the blondes told a cab driver. Again, way to encourage someone who’s actually working for their money to help you out.
- Their final task had the teams opening hotel safes using a combination set by their partner. But there was a 10 minute time limit; if they didn’t figure out the combination during the 10 minutes, they were allowed to leave. That made little sense–until we realized that the next clue sent them to the finish line. In other words, producers wanted to ensure some drama and tension. But they failed, because the teams checked in the same order as they left the final task.
- Rob stood at the finish line smiling but still looking kind of pissed and a little fat.
- Eric and Danielle checked in first and claimed the $1 million. On second thought, who says an all-girl team has never won The Amazing Race?
- Phil handed Eric a cell phone and said, “you guys can call your family.” Eric found himself talking to our old friend Jeremy, who used his few seconds of airtime to make a homoerotic reference and suggest that the two are actually a couple: “Yeah, yeah, I’m rich, biotch. Dude, I’m going to give you some spankings when I get home.”
- “I guess opposites attract, and in this case, our opposites got us, you know, throughout the race,” Danielle said, which in light of Jeremy’s comments seemed kind of sad. She never had a chance, but at least she has $500,000.