On the Lot host calls Carrie Fisher “Carrie Fishy,” rips off Ryan Seacrest

I didn’t think it was possible for On the Lot to deteriorate even more, but that’s exactly what happened last night for its fourth episode. Samantha Harris wannabe Adrianna Costa, who actually used to be a Headline News correspondent, started On the Lot‘s first elimination episode by introducing Carrie Fisher as “Carrie Fishy,” and it was downhill from there.

Adrianna was a disaster, but the show’s producers didn’t help her out: First, they dropped her audio as she was introducing the show, so all we could hear was a muffled voice; a few minutes later, she turned to set herself up for a different camera angle, but they didn’t cut away to the cast members in time so she looked ridiculous. When the show left the theater for a few minutes of at-the-house conversation, her annoying voice narrated the obvious. Narration is always a sign of a show that has nothing else to hold on to, except for more sexism from Garry Marshall (“We need women directors; my sister Penny’s very lonely”).

While the eliminations actually started at 15 minutes past the hour, they also took the remaining 45 minutes, and were ridiculously tedious. Unsurprisingly, there was no mention about how many votes were received, probably because there weren’t even enough votes to account for the directors’ family members. The results were sort of strange: Jason’s “Getta Rhoom,” which the judges criticized for seeming like it was making fun of mentally challenged people, was one of the top three vote-getters, while Carolina Zorilla de San Martin (“Deliver Me”), Claudia La Bianca (“Blind Date”), and Phil Hawkins (“Please Hold”) went home.

The On the Lot eliminations basically ripped off American Idol verbatim. Adrianna’s script was essentially identical to Ryan Seacrest’s, from oral recaps of the films and judges’ comments to the way she told people they weren’t being eliminated (“America voted…”; “…you are safe”). She even tossed to a commercial right to force them to wait even more, and faked out the contestants when revealing who was eliminated.

Are Mark Burnett and Steven Spielberg even watching this piece of crap that carries their names? Throughout the hour, I became increasingly convinced that the show is going to be cancelled soon, so this results show was created just to make us appreciate Ryan Seacrest and the filler in American Idol‘s results show. Ultimately, 45 minutes of incompetently handled eliminations is even more boring than Ford commercials and performances by decaying pop stars with records to sell.

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about the writer

Andy Dehnart is a journalist who has covered reality television for more than 15 years and created reality blurred in 2000. A member of the Television Critics Association, his writing and criticism about television, culture, and media has appeared on NPR and in Playboy, Buzzfeed, and many other publications. Andy, 36, also directs the journalism program at Stetson University in Florida, where he teaches creative nonfiction and journalism. He has an M.F.A. in nonfiction writing and literature from Bennington College. More about reality blurred and Andy.