Chef Ramsay offers to insert pumpkin into a Hell’s Kitchen patron’s behind

Whereas Bravo’s Top Chef is about demonstrating culinary skills and challenging them, Hell’s Kitchen is mostly about humiliation. It’s like boot camp for aspiring chefs, and while that humiliation is entertaining, it’s not entirely pointless, as the chefs last season seemed to actually learn something as a result.

The tough love may have a point, but basically we watch because it’s fun to see Chef Ramsay insult people. Sometimes his insults are completely lame, but sometimes they’re incredibly witty or just funny. So, here are my two favorite insults from last night’s first two episodes:

To a customer who was unhappy with the quantity of pumpkin in his risotto and told Chef Ramsay, “I just want more pumpkin; that’s all I want,” Ramsay went for shock value, replying,

“Right. Well, I’ll get you more pumpkin and I’ll ram it right up your fucking ass. Would you like it whole or diced?”

In episode two, Gabe misheard an order, forcing Chef Ramsay to repeat it. After he did, Ramsay said,

“Now, would you like me to e.mail that to your fucking Blackberry? Move your ass.”