Just two days after continuing to slam his alleged ex-lover by posting evidence of their encounter on his blog, John Paulus has apologized to Clay Aiken and his fans.
Last Wednesday, he posted what he says is Clay’s profile on Adam4Adam, but on Friday, he wrote a long post titled “It’s been five months- My apology,” in which he aplogizes and gives a Bible reference. Naturally, he gives no reason for this stunning turnaround, and he still insists that he had an “experience with Clay,” one that involved unprotected anal sex.
Among other things, Paulus says he regrets telling the story to the Enquirer, and said he tried to retract it. But MSNBC’s Jeannette Walls followed up and reports that its editors don’t agree with that version of events. An editor for the Enquirer tells her, “Our reporter couldn’t get him off the phone. … It’s not a situation where he told the story one time. He engaged in multiple conversations with our reporter. He couldn’t stop talking, and then he talked to reporters after it was out.”
Here’s an excerpt from John Paulus’ long post:
“In an very callow and selfish moment I relayed the story to the National Enquirer. The next day I had come to realize what I had done- I defied a the trust of someone. I attempted to rectify my error by seeking a solution to stop the story from being printed. … Ultimately I am responsible for the story being circulated. I take full and complete responsibility. Those who passed on the information are only responsible for doing their job- they are in the business of gossip. That’s their living.
At Clay’s expense I have sought to “get even” with his rabid fans by starting a blog and divulging information from various sources; each with their own unique agenda. My experience with Clay and my willingness to take on his fans has made me the “magnet” that has attracted many types of people- those who hate Clay; those who love Clay, but dislike his behavior; those who felt wronged; and those who just see this as an opportunity to contribute in the destruction of two human beings. …
To those that claim I want to see Clay fail, my answer to them is a resounding no. I unequivocally wish Clay much success and happiness. This blog was not an attempt to ruin Clay or to seek attention, it was used as a vice to seek vengeance against those fans who continued to soil my name and compromise my livelihood. My vengeance was done at the expense of another human being and I apologize to Clay for that and I hope he will accept. I would also like to apologize to the fans who, through Clay, found joy in their lives that had been vacant for so long- my intention was never to hurt you or destroy the happiness you discovered through his music.
Through the course of my life I have had some regrets- during these tumultuous past five months I have amassed a few more. I regret not being a big enough man to accept the possibility that I was simply someone’s one-night stand; I regret telling my story to the tabloids; I regret defying the trust of Clay; I regret hurting him, his family and his fans; I regret that I started a blog that ridiculed him; and I regret letting my vengeance take control of my sensibilities.
My actions over the past several months is not indicative of who I am as a person. I have no excuse nor can I offer anyone a solid reason for it. Who I am in reality runs counter to all that you read and have come to learn about me. I’m a exceedingly giving and a kind person with a reputation of putting others before myself. … My blog will still exist, but will be a medium where others can come and openly discuss the latest Clay Aiken news without fear of retribution- it will not be a place where Clay’s private life is investigated and exposed. … God Bless each of you.