The cover of the April 6 edition Rolling Stone promises “the secrets of the unstoppable starmaking machine” known as American Idol. Inside, however, the magazine presents an extended interview with Simon Cowell and a few short, uninteresting sidebar Q&As with the show’s other personalities. Besides Paula Abdul’s vagina comment, it presents no real secrets at all. (Maybe the magazine’s new hire will help them rediscover journalism, or at least honesty in cover lines.)
The interview with Simon seeks to understand the caustic judge and the reasons why he became the way he was, but instead just sort of reaffirms that he’s kind of a prick. Nevertheless, it does have a few interesting revelations. For example, Simon:
- starting drinking and smoking when he was nine.
- “often doesn’t wear underwear with his jeans,” of which he has 20 identical pairs (Armani boot-cut).
- is attracted not to women’s personalities but to their “great tits.”
- once jokingly held a bus driver hostage for 10 miles with a toy gun.
- has a “housekeeper [who] runs his bath, always at the exact same temperature.”
- has been offered “in excess of $25 million a year [by other networks] to leave Idol and thereby wreck its future prospects.”
- owns seven cars, a $14 million house in West London, and a $20 million mansion in LA.
- may be worth $90 million, but says that isn’t enough. All he wants in life is “money. As much money as I can get my hands on.”