a breakdown of Paula’s weird judging.

a breakdown of Paula’s weird judging.
It’s kind of been a tough week for American Idol judge Paula Abdul: First, she defended her weird behavior by admitting to an illness. Then, Corey Clark said, to paraphrase William Hung, “We banged”. And now, USA TODAY is analyzing her judging, categorizing her ridiculous and inane statements. The paper says “Paula is anything but straight up in her rulings and has proved to be the Fox show’s most mystifyingly multifaceted musical magistrate,” and it provides “a rundown of her various guises.” Highlights of USA TODAY’s categories, with my summary of what they entail:

  • Paula the Puffer: Makes shit up.
  • Paula the Parrot: Repeats everything Randy says.
  • Paula the Minx: Gets turned on by the performance and performer, and we all know where that leads.
  • Paula the Mother Hen: Praises the contestants, especially when they suck or are really ugly.