new shows: “biblical” weddings, smokers, Hilfiger, Motley Crew guys, Bobby Brown.

new shows: “biblical” weddings, smokers, Hilfiger, Motley Crew guys, Bobby Brown.
New reality series in the works include a sanctimonious show about marriage, a show about smokers giving up their habit, and a few hundred new celebrity shows. Details:

  • The “family-friendly” people have clearly lost the argument when they have to turn to reality TV to promote the sanctity of marriage. An American Wedding “celebrates the beauty and romance of a wedding while presenting the truth in a marriage based on a covenant,” the Southern Baptist Convention’s Baptist Press reports in a hysterical article (read the whole thing, really; it’s almost as good as The Onion). The couples were selected via a contest on a web site “which sought to promote biblical monogamous, heterosexual marriage values.”
  • In a closely related story, PAX TV will air a series that chronicles people’s efforts to quit smoking. Cold Turkey “takes 10 unsuspecting chain smokers who were brought to the show under variety of pretenses, only to discover that the real task will be to quit smoking cold turkey,” according to Mediaweek. A.J. Benza will host the series (seriously), which debuts on Oct. 3 at 10 p.m. ET.
  • In a few weeks, we’re going to have to start noting which celebrities don’t have reality TV series because they’re about to become the minority. Seriously, this insanity must stop. Come up with a new idea, retards. Among the new celebrity series: CBS is giving Tommy Hilfiger his own series, which worked well for his daughter and her friend, who, as E! Online points out, had a series on MTV that “resulted in a stint in rehab for Hilfiger and ultimately ruined the girls’ relationship.” … Bravo wants to follow Bobby Brown “for a reality series about the R&B singer’s troubled life,” The Hollywood Reporter says. The network is negotiating with Whitney Houston about her, sniff, “role.” … Finally, two Motley Crue members, Tommy Lee and Vince Neil, are prepping for new series, according to Billboard. NBC will follow Tommy Lee for a show “centered on his enrollment in college.” MTV is picking up The Remaking of Vince Neil, which “will document Neil’s attempt at a career comeback with the help of makeover specialists.”
  • Surprisingly, man not eaten alive on Eaten Alive

    Eaten Alive

    Discovery Channel’s happy family holiday special Eaten Alive aired Sunday, rewarding viewers for their two full hours of viewing by ensuring that they spent quality time in the company of others instead of wasting that time doing something else that might not have been as satisfying, such as buying things that have labels which accurately reflect their contents.

    Winter 2015 reality TV debut schedule

    winter 2015 reality TV schedule

    Mark your calendars with all these upcoming reality TV show debuts, including Celebrity Apprentice, The Bachelor, and another season of MasterChef Junior, all of which kick off in early January.

    There are also 20+ shows debuting in December--including the one-off return of The Sing Off. No winter break for reality TV.

    about the writer

    Andy Dehnart is a journalist who has covered reality television for more than 15 years and created reality blurred in 2000. A member of the Television Critics Association, his writing and criticism about television, culture, and media has appeared on NPR and in Playboy, Buzzfeed, and many other publications. Andy, 36, also directs the journalism program at Stetson University in Florida, where he teaches creative nonfiction and journalism. He has an M.F.A. in nonfiction writing and literature from Bennington College. More about reality blurred and Andy.