Jessica will star as Jessica Sampson in her rack-referencing ABC sitcom.

Jessica will star as Jessica Sampson in her rack-referencing ABC sitcom.
Branching off from Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica to the world of ABC sitcoms will apparently not involve much branching for Jessica. Defamer, the answer to the West coast’s bitchy blog inferiority complex, has obtained and watched a copy of the pilot. The site says it “was the most excruciating television viewing experience we’ve ever had, and once we screened Rock Me Baby during a ball (or labia) waxing.” In an apparent effort to keep Jessica’s confusion to a bare minimum, her character’s name on “Jessica” will be “Jessica Sampson,” and she’ll be dating “an offscreen boyfriend named ‘Vic.'” Besides “incessant references to Jessica’s rhododendron-level intellect,” Defamer also says that in the first episode, “there were frequent mentions of her rack.”

Surprisingly, man not eaten alive on Eaten Alive

Eaten Alive

Discovery Channel’s happy family holiday special Eaten Alive aired Sunday, rewarding viewers for their two full hours of viewing by ensuring that they spent quality time in the company of others instead of wasting that time doing something else that might not have been as satisfying, such as buying things that have labels which accurately reflect their contents.

Winter 2015 reality TV debut schedule

winter 2015 reality TV schedule

Mark your calendars with all these upcoming reality TV show debuts, including Celebrity Apprentice, The Bachelor, and another season of MasterChef Junior, all of which kick off in early January.

There are also 20+ shows debuting in December--including the one-off return of The Sing Off. No winter break for reality TV.

about the writer

Andy Dehnart is a journalist who has covered reality television for more than 15 years and created reality blurred in 2000. A member of the Television Critics Association, his writing and criticism about television, culture, and media has appeared on NPR and in Playboy, Buzzfeed, and many other publications. Andy, 36, also directs the journalism program at Stetson University in Florida, where he teaches creative nonfiction and journalism. He has an M.F.A. in nonfiction writing and literature from Bennington College. More about reality blurred and Andy.